Snowy Dreams

I Hate This

I pull away and leave her dangling
after sharing something so magic
It’s too complicated to be
my hopes and dreams.
She deserves better than me.

But when I hold her in my arms
I forget all the reasons we can’t
There’s this way she looks at me-
like I set her free;
like we’re meant to be.

So I can’t walk away from her,
I always return
She holds a part of me in her
but I don’t think she knows
‘cause I always run away before dawn 

If only things were different,
if only flags and tongues didn’t matter
I would have secured her heart
made it so we would never part
but we just can’t be together

But it’s the way she loves me,
like my flaws don’t matter;
The way she believes in me
when I’ve lost all hope;
The way she stood by me
when I hurt her the most 

And I hate myself for doing this
running around in circles
but forever was taken away from us
so if I can’t keep her as my love,
can’t I keep her in my heart?

There aren’t any who compare to how
she makes me feel like I am the world
and that I actually am worth
being loved.
So I can’t let go of her,
not just yet.
But I hate hurting her
I hate this. 

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Invite me, intice me
reel me in;
Compel me, seduce me;
pull me in
Into your arms, into your heart
where the sky flickers
between shades of red
and the deepest blue

Lure me into your eyes
with that captivating smile
Breathe on my skin
so I feel your love settling in
Bite me, tear me
rip me apart
So I have a scar
to remind me how we loved

Love me, hurt me
it’s all the same thing
Love me, hurt me-
Save me from him.

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We go in circles,
I don’t even know what road
We’re travelling on
It’s like a labyrinth
washed over with rainbows
but beneath the surface
is a forest wrapped in thorns
where black roses grow in the dawn
and white roses die in the night sky
having waited a lifetime for light　

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poetry spilled ink not really finished

For me it’s simply just about
the electric current that rushes
through my skin when he touches
me in the simplest way

For me it’s about the magic moments
when he stares into my eyes
It’s in those moments I see life
for what it was meant to be today

For me it’s about every second we’re apart
it makes me realise how firmly
he’s lodged into my heart
‘cause he’s all I ever think about

For me it’s about ignoring the green eyes
and pretending I can’t hear the lies
because I know what’s between us
is more than they could ever know

For me it’s about being so in love
that the only thing that can hurt
me is if he decides one day
that he doesn’t feel the same

For me, happiness comes
in the crook of his arm,
the brush of his kiss
For me, he is everything. 

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Tell me how was it over
before we even began?
Tell me how to let go
of the nothing that we had
Tell me it wasn’t a dream;
tell me it was actually real
Because I can’t seem to stop feeling
like you were the home I’d been yearning for;
the love worth dying for;
the first lover in these pumping walls 

Tell me we weren’t a joke;
tell me you weren’t really in love with her
Tell me you didn’t dream of her eyes
when I stayed up thinking of you all night

Come and tell me you’re sorry;
you made a mistake
when you said goodbye
when you made my heart break

Tell me you love me;
Tell me it’s true
Don’t let this be over
Don’t let me hate you. 

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poetry spilled ink uhhh dno

I’m a little bit lost;
I’m a little bit found
Dancing under streetlights
wandering around town

I don’t know where I’m going
or where I really belong
So I blindly follow whatever
direction the wind takes me along

I look for sense and reason
but shy from reality and commitment
It’s the age of recklessness and spontaneity;
I just want to be free
of all the expectation, the rules, the regulations
Can’t I just breathe
after being so restricted?

Is it a crime to want
to walk on the wild side
Having watched behind
bars all my life? 

And I don’t know what I’m doing
but sometimes I like not knowing. 
It makes me feel like I’m living.
 

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poetry spilled ink personal thoughts

So euphoric I could soar into the sky,
Take my hand we’ll dance in the moonlight
I’ll make you laugh baby, you’ll feel so good 
I’ll make you forget every her that ever touched you      

There’s no stopping us, we’re on a mission
to bring the world together with our rainbow vision
Tell me what love can’t conquer in this world
where even the coldest hearts can feel hurt       

We’ll save them honey, with our love
Show them why they can’t give up
For every disbeliever we’ll reknew their faith;
show them that love does exist, always      

Because that’s what you did for me;
that’s why I have to help everyone else believe
Once upon a time, I shut the door on love
until you came knocking and healed my scars    

So this is for you my love, all of this
You’ve given me back something
I thought I would never find again, never could
believe in love and life- but I do with you.

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You’ve cried so many tears
you would have thought by now
that he was washed out of your system
but apparently you’ve just been flowering
that seed, that feeling; they call it love
you don’t get a choice in the matter
It’s down to your reckless heart

Try as you might to cry him out
it only makes you realise you can’t be without
And though they may say it’s time to walk away
time and time again
You simply find yourself wandering
towards the only source of true happiness
you ever found.
How could you leave that behind?　 

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You scar my soul
But I always come back for more
Even when I can’t walk,
I still find the energy to crawl
I always stumble back into your reach
even when I mean to leave

It’s so wrong; it’s so right
We’re a mess; we’re so blind 
How do we tell the truth from lies
when it’s all coloured in with the same light?
Is there really any distinguishing, any clarification on the horizon?
Or will we remain this mess, too afraid to say goodbye? 

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poetry spilled ink

Take a leap of faith,
be spontaneous
because sometimes
when you plan ahead
it’s just not meant to be. 

So ignore the fingers;
ignore the jaded eyes
If it makes you happy
run with it; go wild
because Life was never made to fit
the measurements we crafted 

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poetry spilled ink thoughts